Oh, the rich. Where do I start. You're such a huge problem for the rest of us. Burning up natural resources, getting away with murder, profiting from our hard work and suffering.... You know I learned in school that ten percent of the people have ninety percent of the wealth.... Well, do the math here... if we killed all the rich people we'd have ten times more money to go around for the rest of us. What do these rich people do all day? Eat at fancy restaurants, use $80 lip balm, drive golf carts around their estates, and buy and sell the rest of us? WTF?
Here's a list of rich people and how and/or why I think they should be killed.
Rupert Murdoch: Forced to watch fox reality programming, and have a nail driven into a different body part every time anyone uses the phrases "baby daddy, shorty, or the bomb"
Paris Hilton: Torn limb from limb by malnourished tea cup chihuahuas.
George Bush Senior: Forced to smoke crack until his heart explodes for his involvement in the "free way rick" c.i.a. crack smuggling operation.
Living Enron People: I know that Ken Lay got off easy dying and all.... That's why I'd like to see the rest of the living Enron execs drooped off in Cabrini Green in Black Face and forced to perform a minstrel show until the shooting makes it stop.
The Pope and Associated Papery: Well the current pope was a member of Hitler youth... John Paul II was a salesman at I.G. Farben, the company that manufactured and sold cyanide to the Nazis for use in concentration camps... Not to mention all this child molestation that's been covered up. I say sodomized with a hot poker!
Eric Clapton: Grrr... I hate you so much Eric Clapton, I mean some of your early work in the 60s is okay, but man you sold out major by the 80s.... You produced the kind of syrupy sweet soft-core radio rock that surely has Robert Johnson rolling in his grave and your unabashed grave robbing of Mississippi delta blues greats seems to leave only one solution... Beaten to death with a $3,000 Eric Clapton signature series martin guitar.
Tom Shane: This is for the Colorado locals. I swear if I have to hear the address of your stores one more time... You are going to have a friend in the hitting you in the face with a crow bar business. Also, you sound like a chomo.
Tom Cruise: I wonder if you were always a creepy weirdo or it was the result of years of Scientology's brain washing. I'd like to see you slide on socks down a hard wood hallway into a meat grinder.
Corporate Prison C.E.O.s : Hey, did you know that 100% of our jails and prisons are run for profit? It's true. Seems kinda immoral huh? I would give them a choice between hanging, lethal injection, or firing squad.
Dick Cheney & Donald Rumsfeld: Oh, these two... These guys have been up to no good since the 70s. I think they should be placed in side of a scale model of the world trade center, then exploded with thermite after having model planes flown into them.
Inventor of Crocs: These shoes are hideous, and you should die for making them
O.J. Simpson: Look, we all know O.J. is gonna fuck up again, can't we just execute him now and get it over with?
Federal Reserve and IRS heads: Many of you may not realize that not only are the federal reserve and IRS not governmental agencies and actually private corporations.... but they are also completely illegal and unconstitutional. I demand Bernanke's head on a platter now!
I'm sure we can all find a solution if we just work together.
There are only 2 ways to get rich: You either get lucky or get ruthless; if you get lucky money will turn you into a cunt, and if you are ruthless you are already a cunt.
ReplyDeleteThats why 99.9% of rich people are arrogant self serving, uncaring, pretentious, parasitic fuck wipes who depend on the poor for their wealth whilst at the same time being completely ignorant of the fact.
Kill them all and use their money to feed the millions of starving human beings in the world.
i hate rich people, there was this rich kid in my school and every day his dad would come early and drop him off in front of the school with his convertable sports car doors that open vertically and open them and just stand there and act like an ass to everyone who walks by and my dad, who works from 8:00am to 10:00pm, 7 days a week, would drop me off in his old white van and they would laugh at me when I walk by! I HATED THEM! And the worst part is that every day, after school, his step mom would pick him up in her pink lamborghini and all she had to do for it was marry his dad! Every year we would have a charity thing and whoever puts the most money would get to skip school and go to a field trip and every year that kid would win because his dad would put $1,000 in and I never got to go even though i had much better grades than him! Anyway, we're in highschool now, he got his license and his dad bought him a mercedes. Guess what i'm getting... NOTHING!
ReplyDeleteAll this energy and thought could be put into getting rich.
ReplyDeleteYou are just Jealous. Being rich is not bad. Only those people who want to be rich but can't hate rich people!
ReplyDeleteI have met alot of rich people. some of them work hard, others do not. but almost all were before they started working. the few who did not start out as well, are intensely busy people. I am not jealous, though I do want alot of money too, I am resentful.
ReplyDelete